The Strategy That Hit Back On APC

Yesterday: “I must say that this historic development (Tambuwal’s defection to APC with Speakership) means that our democracy is growing by the day and it is dynamic…. We think that having the head of the legislature from the opposition party makes for a balanced setting in government and it’s good for democracy” APC National Publicity Secretary, Lai Mohammed (Thisday, October 29, 2014). Today: “If you understand how the National Assembly works and the kind of power the leadership has, you will understand the danger of what happened yesterday. For instance today, we can no longer talk about having leadership caucus in the National Assembly today because the leadership is made up of both the PDP and the APC”. APC National Publicity Secretary, Lai Mohammed (Channels TV, June 10, 2015) The 360 Degrees turn by the All Progressives Congress (APC) from their original stand on bipartisan leadership in the National Assembly in less than eight months and the drama playing out in Abuja since the inauguration of the 8th National Assembly have further confounded those who thought our change had come. As in George Orwell’s Animal Farm where the pigs (the impostor leaders) now walk on two legs, party, and gulp exotic rums with their so-called human oppressors, it is now difficult to tell the difference between the APC and the much-demonised Peoples Democratic Party (PDP). Those who branded it the All Pretenders Congress, appear to be having the last laugh, for if it is all about the interest of the masses the apocalyptic battles for control would have been unnecessary. With a handful of puppet lawmakers and ethnically bigoted section of the press to boot, some puppeteer party leaders feign ignorance of the difference between a party’s constitution and the Nigerian Constitution or between a National Assembly of Nigeria and the APC party office. They would therefore not accept the outcome of the June 9th elections for the positions of the presiding officers of the National Assembly because it did not go their way. The first salvo culminating in the present crisis in the National Assembly was fired by APC’s National Publicity Secretary, Alhaji Lai Mohammed. According to him: “Senator Bukola and Hon. Dogara are not the candidates of the APC and a majority of its National Assembly members-elect for the positions of Senate President and House Speaker…. The party is supreme and its interest is superior to that of its individual members”. For those who refused to tow party lines, “There can be no higher level of treachery, disloyalty and insincerity within any party”. Unfortunately, APC leaders are coming to equity with unclean hands. They have not told Nigerians what portion of the constitution empowers their party to impose presiding officers on the National Assembly- as though members elected on other party platforms have no say in who leads them. Ironically, these proponents of party are mainly the same brains behind the emergence of Hon. Aminu Tambuwal as the Speaker of the House of Representatives against PDP’s will. The Action Congress (ACN) elements of what we know today as APC practically coerced even the South West House of Reps Members to vote against their own daughter and sister, Hon. Mulikat Adeola-Akande because only one crock must crow in the entire Yorubaland. However, it is the emergence of Senator Ike Ekweremadu as the Deputy Senate President that truly unmasked APC’s inconsistencies and duplicity. Not surprisingly, the same people who defended Tambuwal’s are fighting Ekweremadu with the cudgels of intimidation, blackmail, media terrorism, and all manner of harassment. But they have obviously met their match in the young man who doesn’t even seem to care a hoot. In addition to Lai Mohammed’s enthusiastic defence of bipartisan National Assembly leadership captured in the opening quote, he insisted that “Those who are saying this has not happened before and that Tambuwal should step aside as Speaker do not have the backing of history and the constitution”. The Minority Leader at the time, Hon. Femi Gbajabiamila declared: “We are proud to acknowledge that the Speaker remains not only a Member of the House of Representatives, but also its Speaker. This position is consistent with the law and practice in a presidential system of government and Nigeria is no different. For the avoidance of doubt, the Constitution requires only that the Speaker or Deputy Speaker of the House of Representatives shall be elected by members of that House from among themselves”. Even President Mohammadu Buhari was not to be outdone. He enthused: “It was only yesterday I admit that I asked what profession is he and I was told he was a lawyer, I said no wonder. We will like to thank Alhaji Aminu Tambuwal for what he did yesterday. We were overwhelmed. Taking such a remarkable risk and sending everybody on holidays till December is an achievement”. In addition, just a few days before the inauguration of the 8th Senate, the APC helped their members to emerge as Speakers in Plateau and Benue States Houses of Assembly, notwithstanding the fact that the PDP were in the majority. Yet, they would not allow Nigerians peace because a PDP Senator became Deputy Senate President, even when the PDP had the opportunity to elect one of their own as the Senate Number One. Only a few like the National Deputy Spokesman of the APC, Timi Frank has summoned the courage to say the truth. In his widely transcribed appearance on the African Independent Television (AIT) on 29th June this year, he said: “On the issue of how Ekweremadu emerged as the Deputy Senate President, for God’s sake, PDP felt that, well, we have been able to give them the Senate Presidency unanimously. We are not trying to be greedy. We are trying to respect democracy. They could have nominated themselves to be Senate President and Deputy Senate President; and you cannot take that from them. “We should thank PDP for what they did, for being democratic. They know they are not the ruling party, so they respected themselves by making sure an APC Senate President emerged. They unanimously gave their support to Saraki as we only had about seven or eight APC Senators in the Senate as at that time. “One of the APC Senators that was present contested alongside Ekweremadu and lost. Not that they just asked Ekweremadu to be the Deputy Senate President. No! It was live on TV. PDP was more in number, so, they voted for their own. At the end of the day, Ekweremadu emerged as the Deputy President of the Senate. My party caused the downfall, why we lost the Deputy Senate Presidency. We don’t need to be blaming Ekweremadu and so forth. If it were anybody from my party or even myself, I would take advantage of the situation that was on ground”. But rather than be grateful as Timi Frank advised them, some APC leaders are deliberately clutching at every imaginary straw to make the National assembly ungovernable. The alleged forgery of the Senate Standing Rule being promoted by Senator Kabir Marafa and his co-travelers is just one of their monkeyshines. As far as records can show, the National Assembly has always produced Standing Rules at the beginning of each National Assembly. The Rules of the previous Senate can only be part of the Rules of the new Senate to the extent that the management of the National Assembly reproduces them. So, what the Unity Forum and their falconers deliberately call a forged copy of Senate Rule is a new document strictly for the 8th Senate, amendable by the 8th Senate, and to end with the 8th Senate. If Marafa and his puppeteers insist that the 2015 Senate Rule is invalid; that the 8th Senate was invalidly inaugurated; and that its presiding officers were illegally elected, why did they submit themselves to be inaugurated on 10th June after missing out the first day 9th June? They that the Senate leadership is illegal, yet they insist that APC National Chairman’s letter imposing their members as principal officers must be read by the same supposedly illegal Senate leadership. Again, how come they want to be principal officers of a supposedly illegally inaugurated Senate? Meanwhile, the media propaganda to run Ekweremadu out of office only appears to be making the man even more popular. Was Ekweremadu still a Senator or Deputy Senate President between June 4th when his second tenure in that office ended and when he was re-inaugurated on 9th June? How does what transpired within an interregnum that he was out of office concern him? Ekweremadu’s recontesting that position was by mere chance. So, why would Mark or Ekweremadu change the Rule for the APC to benefit from? It all sounds idiotic. So, let us just say the truth and shame the Devil- what the members of the Senate Unity Forum want are principal officers positions and juicy committees. But that can only come through constructive engagement and lobbying, which is the practice, the world over. Subterfuge, noise making, blackmails, and trying to coerce their colleagues with tyrannical external influences won’t help them. Those who come to equity must come with clean hands- and possibly a pure heart too.

10 Richest Nigerian comedians and their sources of wealth

Comedians are meant to be funny, right? Yes, the stand-up comedians dominating Nigeria’s humour business landscape are funny quite alright on stage, but very serious in business. With assets running into billions of naira, they are light years apart from the past crops of old comedians who wait on people for meager rations of life. They may look funny and unserious, but they are cavorting to the bank and living their dreams. Ali Baba, the father of stand-up comedians in Nigeria, aptly captured in words, the profitability of comedy business when he said: “comedy is a funny business, a very big business.” After a careful study of the careers of these successful comedians, Showtime came to the conclusion that a number of them are outstanding. Here are the top 10 in this branch of entertainment in terms of their assets, the money they charge per show, the various products or corporate endorsements they did, and their established brands from which they make steady income.

Alibaba: With over thirty years of performing on stage and hosting events for almost all Nigeria’s former presidents and the present one, Ali Baba sits at the apex. Even President Olusegun Obasanjo once jokingly accused him of being overpaid for his performance. His Lekki mansion where he lives is said to be worth more than N300 million alone. Alibaba makes his money through a chain of businesses in Lagos: as a reputed motivational speaker, a professional comedian patronised by almost all the big brands and political bigwigs in the country. His net worth is estimated to be over 3 billion naira. It is estimated that he performs in a minimum of two events weekly at an average rate of 4 to 4.5million naira per event. That would add up to about 400 million naira per annum!

Basketmouth: He has been associated with many companies, signing different endorsement contracts in the last six years. He also has an impressive list of branding deals with Amstel Malta, Globacom Ltd. and a host of others. With his sold-out shows in South African, London, and even in far away America, and on his Basketmouth Uncensored platform, the comedian has been so consistent since he came to limelight. His assets are estimated to be worth 2 billion naira. His annual income may be in excess of 192 million, while endorsement deals run into over 120 million annually. His international show, Basketmouth Uncensored, rakes in an estimated 100million naira. This artiste makes over 360 million annually.

I Go Dye: United Nations Millennium Developmental Goal Ambassador, Amb. Francis Agoda, fondly called I Go Dye is the C.E.O of Revamp Construction Company, a property, real estate and road Construction Company. An estimate of his annual income stands between 350 and 500million naira, while his net worth is valued at over 2 billion naira. With properties in choice areas across Nigeria, and fleet of luxury cars, he is the man to beat. He also has a special performing relationship with almost all the governors in the country. His business empire is increasing every day. Presently, he is constructing a bottle water company, Franstel Natural Bottle Water.

Julius Agwu: He made over 20 million naira alone from the launch of his book when he turned 40. He has properties scattered all over the country, a state-of-the-art audio and video studio, and more political affiliates than any other comedian. For over a decade now, Julius Agwu has been organising two events: Crack Your Ribs and Laugh for Christ Sake. He is reputed to own properties in 3 states in Nigeria, and is also the C.E.O of Real Laff Entertainment Company which is an event management firm. His performance fee is between 2 to 3million naira per event, and his annual take-home is estimated at 180million while his personally organised events are estimated to be about 140 million annually. His net worth is valued to be 1.5 billion naira.

AY: Since his foray into this money making business, he has risen faster than anticipated with a performance fee that is between 1 and 2 million naira per event, while his A.Y Live events organised annually rakes in 160 million annually. He is said to be earning 280 million naira annually. His net worth is put at 800 million naira. He is also working on his MVP club and also runs an event company. He also has fleets of cars and properties at Lekki area in Lagos.

Gbenga Adeyinka: No comedian anchors more events than him presently. He is constantly busy and a top choice with politicians.He has properties and several business interests besides his Laffmattaz which is always a sold out show with more than 5000 people in attendance every year

Okey Bakaasi: He anchors upscale events steadily and must have made huge money from politics too as Senior Special Assistant on entertainment in Imo State. He has a mansion in Imo State and Canada.

TEE-A: A highly gifted wedding MC, he has equipment and an events company. He anchors mainly heightened events and also does private businesses

BOVI: He has made a lot of money lately from events, adverts and tours. He is probably the hottest kid right now.

YAW Yaw is into the big league with a choice property in Lagos. He also makes money from MTN adverts, radio presentations, radio hypes, anchoring events, equipment leasing and other businesses.

Buhari Carbon of Obasanjo

Afro-beat King, Fela Anikulapo-Kuti was well known to have criticised societal ills as well as every government in his time. He did this through his hilarious but acidic lyrics. Instrumentalist, musician, multi-talented composer, pioneer of the Afro-beat genre, human rights activist and political maverick, Fela played a significant role in Nigeria’s development process with his revolutionary music. He did so not really because he found it pleasurable, but because he considered his music as a vehicle to keep these governments on their toes. In the process, he garnered ardent admirers and followers although he also drew enmity from government which he criticised. Two Nigerian leaders who really got it hot from the Ebami Eda (the Strange One) himself are Gen. Olusegun Obasanjo and Gen. Muhammadu Buhari. Ironically, these two former leaders eventually found their way back to power, the recent being Gen. Buhari, who beat the sitting president in the March 28, 2015 presidential election. Fela’s differences with Obasanjo started with the 1977 release of the album, Zombie, a scathing critique on Nigerian soldiers, in which he used the zombie metaphor to describe the ways of the Nigerian military, which was everything but rational. Zombie, as Fela sang, was like a robot; he would kill if asked to kill and would even take his own life if asked to ‘go and die’. The album became very popular that the Obasanjo government was so embarrassed that it allegedly ordered an attack on Kalakuta Republic, the area housing Fela’s music operations, destroying instruments and other equipment. Fela was beaten black and blue and his aged mother allegedly thrown out from a window, which was believed to have led to her death. This action drew widespread condemnation and attracted public sympathy to Fela. He eventually led his followers to deliver a mock coffin of his mother at Dodan Barracks, the then seat of government in Lagos. But they were chased away by armed soldiers, preventing them access to the compound. Obasanjo’s response was to set up an inquiry to ascertain those responsible for the attack. The eventual verdict was that it was carried out by ‘unknown soldier’. Fela would then release two albums on the attack: Coffin for Head of State and Unknown Soldier, criticising Obasanjo’s actions. This offended the government more especially his description of Obasanjo and Shehu Musa Yar’Adua at Dodan Barracks when he took the mother’s mock coffin there. “Obasanjo dey there with big fat stomach, Yar’Adua dey there with neck like Ostrich,” Fela sang. What with more lyrics like: Look Obasanjo! Before anything at all, him go dey shout: ‘Oh Lord, oh Lord, oh Lord, Almighty Lord!’ ‘Oh Lord, oh God!’ And them do bad bad bad bad bad bad things Through Jesus Christ our Lord (Amen, Amen, Amen!) By the grace of Almighty Lord (Amen, Amen, Amen!) I say, look Yar’Adua! I say, look Yar’Adua! Before anything at all, him go dey shout: ‘Habba Allah, habba Allah, habba Allah!’ ‘Habba Allah, habba Allah!’ And them do, yes yes And them do bad bad bad bad bad bad things Through Mohammed our Lord Amen, Amen, Amen! By the grace of Almighty Allah Amen, Amen, Amen! (from Coffin for Head of State) And: Them start magic Them seize my house wey them don burn Them seize my land Them drive all the people wey live in area Two thousand citizens Them make them all homeless now Them start magic Them start magic Them bring flame, them bring hat Them conjure, them bring rabbit Them bring egg, them bring smoke Them dey scream, them dey fall Them conjure, spirit catch them Them dey fall, them dey scream Them dey shout Them dey, them dey say Unknown soldier! Na him do am Which kind injustice is this? Wetin concern government inside? If na unknown soldier I said, wetin concern government inside? If na unknown soldier We get unknown police We get unknown soldier We get unknown civilian All is equal to unknown government (from Unknown Soldier). Even after Obasanjo had left office, Fela also released a few more albums critical of him; the most popular being ITT (International Thief Thief) and Army arrangement, which condemned Obasanjo’s actions in office. Although Fela never actually sang any song criticising the then new government of Gen. Buhari before his arrest in 1984, it was believed that the currency-trafficking charge brought against him was trumped-up and politically-motivated as Gen. Buhari was the federal commissioner (minister) for petroleum during Obasanjo’s government when N2.8 billion ‘oil money’ was reportedly missing, which Fela sang about in Army Arrangement: Two-point-eight-billion naira Oil money is missing Two-point-eight-billion naira Oil money is missing Them set up inquiry Them say money no loss o Them dabaru everybody Supervisor Obasanjo Them say make him no talk o ‘Money no lost’, them shout again Inquiry come close o E no finish, e no finish… (From Army Arrangement). Gen. Buhari’s government eventually charged Fela for currency-trafficking offenses, found him guilty and sentenced him to five years imprisonment. He only regained his freedom when Buhari’s successor, Gen. Ibrahim Babangida granted him pardon two years later. In an interview with Newswatch magazine after his release, Fela revealed that the judge who sentenced him, visited him in prison after Buhari’s overthrow, and informed Fela that the evidence against him was not enough to have found him guilty, and revealed to Fela that he was only obeying ‘order from above’ to ensure he was convicted. The judge then sought Fela’s forgiveness. It was not readily known if Fela forgave Gen. Buhari as Beasts of No Nation, his 1990 release was his best opportunity to take his pound of flesh off the general. Bringing the full force of his talents to play, the Afro-beat legend made powerful metaphorical references to Buhari’s government. For sending him to jail, he referred to both Buhari and late Brig. Tunde Idiagbon, Buhari’s deputy, as ‘craze man’ and ‘animal in human skin’. A line also made reference to how the judge came to apologise: ‘dem judge dey beg ee-o’ (they gave guilty verdict and still sought forgiveness). But the most titillating metaphor in that track, which roused his fans to ultimate adoration, and which also guided many Nigerians to properly juxtapose the Buhari government against human reality, was Fela’s comparison between the life he knew before his imprisonment (outside world) and the life inside prison (inside world); and that some human actions in the outside world were irrational, making the inside world seemingly preferable: The time weh I dey for prison, I call am ‘inside world’ The time weh I dey outside prison, I call am ‘outside world’ Na craze world, na him be outside world. Then he went ahead to list some of the ‘craze’ things that happen in the ‘outside world’ and those who inhabit it No be outside-de police-i dey No be outside-de soldier-ha dey No be outside-de court dem dey No be outside-de magistrate dey No be outside-de judge dem dey Na craze world be dat …. No be outside-dem find me guilty No be outside-dem jail me five years ——————I no do nothing No be outside judge dey beg o …. (From Beasts of No Nation). Going against Fela’s wish Fela had already passed on when Chief Obasanjo was elected president in 1999. If the Afro-beat maestro were to be alive then, he certainly would have hauled missiles at Obasanjo through his music. In a concert before the 1999 election, Seun, one of Fela’s sons, who has made a name for himself musically, revealed that one of his late father’s strongest wishes was that Obasanjo should not return to rule Nigeria again. But against Fela’s wish, the Nigerian people elected Obasanjo that year and re-elected him in 2013, making him lead Nigeria for eight whole years in his second coming as head of the Nigerian state. And when Gen. Buhari’s final and successful attempt at the presidency was gathering momentum, Femi Kuti, Fela’s first son re-echoed this wish in an interview with CNN Christiane Amanpour, before the election, that his late father informed him of how the judge who sentenced him came to beg him in prison for forgiveness, implying that there was no legal basis for Buhari’s government to have jailed his father, though it was not certain that it was Buhari who ordered the judge to jail him. Talks of this nature did not count much as they were drowned by politicking. Like Obasanjo, the Nigerian people went against this wish to elect Gen. Buhari. What did these imply for Fela’s ardent and numerous admirers? Did Nigerians who almost adored the Strange One forget the Afro-beat maestro? Human rights abuses during the military era were made issues during the election campaigns, but no one remembered the particular case of Fela. Nigerians were poised for change and Buhari himself brilliantly said, ‘I cannot change the past but we can reshape the future.’ Nigerians have given General Muhammadu Buhari chance to lead them. And they are sure that the Buhari of the military era has transformed into a democrat who will not tolerate any animal in human skin